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Monody by Saellyn Yesterday 3:11 am
One Wolf's Prayer by Haakan Yesterday 12:03 am
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From now on by Ptak Feb 17 2018 12:09 am
Seriously, Why by Ief Feb 16 2018 10:21 pm

Private One Wolf's Prayer
Haakan Low Control
— Portrayed by Tobii
Male Akdarr V Heterosexual

"It feels like I'm a lone survivor, forgotten in a dark and deadly world."
"And on my own I walk alone, to see the sun again; I'd give anything."
The weeks of winter spent patrolling, scavenging, and assisting those who'd stayed within the ranks of Zaktan'en had finally taken a toll on him. They had placed their absolute faith within the Dragon Emperor, and he was failing them to uphold an oath...just as he had done with his biological family when Tybalt gave him the choice between the two. History was repeating itself; and if the answer had never been clear before, it was today. No matter how much he loved them, he would always hold his duty to the mountains above all else.

Every small prey he captured, he gave to the hungry. Every pelt, he gave to those who lacked warmth.

He did it without question; without missing a single beat. He told them he ate his first catch of the day and saved the remaining for the rest of them, and that his hide was made for this weather. They were enduring too much pain and suffering to do anything other than take his word for it.

And that was why he lay there now, dying. Cold, and alone.

Each exhale that followed the rise and fall of his barreled chest ascended within the atmosphere to take the form of listless clouds. He was too weak to even attempt to get up anymore. The trail behind him told a story in itself, the way his footprints started back at the top of the mountain and turned to large divots. As though he had fallen repeatedly, and crawled to get to where he lay now. He didn't want them to see him like this. The icy sting of frigid winter had started to take on a warm and tingly, welcoming allure. Sleep... He could barely keep his good eye open.

Please... he thought to himself in what he assumed would be his final waking moments. Visions of those he'd trusted most flashed before his eyes.

Aziza...Frerin...Ief...please save them. Zaktan'en needs you..

His final words drifted across the mountaintops, unknowingly as a telepathic cry to anyone who would listen. A final plea for Zaktan'en and those he was leaving behind. He loved them all, so much.

I speakI think


Haakan possesses Aura of Truth, and can tell when someone is lying.
Please mention lies in your post OOCly!
Saellyn Savage
— Portrayed by Lynx
Female Akdarr V Homosexual
How could she have ever possibly expected what was to happen that day?

How could anyone, really?

She hadn't left her den that morning with the intention of saving a life. She had left her den to seek out the Dragon Emperor for a request only, a question. She had only wanted to know if he would be willing to help gather a few of those who remained for a trip to gather healing herbs, and then to hopefully give everyone a check up as best she could in the aftermath of the trip.

She knew that they were hungry and cold, and that these were not the things that she could help with. She was no hunter, she was a healer. She could stop bleeding and heal illness, but she couldn't heal an empty belly. The least she could do was treat their bumps and bruises, give them plants that warmed them from the inside out so at least the ice that clung to their pelts wouldn't bother them, even if for a moment. She was just as hungry and cold as they, but she could at least do her job.

She had been hoping, that as someone of the same kind as her, Haakan would be doing alright. She knew that she was doing better than most, the fat stores on her body keeping her both warm and giving her more energy out of the little that she managed to catch. That was why she sought him out, hoping that since they were so alike in build, he would be in the best condition to help her.

She had felt the a shiver of cold unease race down her spine like greyhounds as she tracked his scent to the mountain top, but she blamed it on the wind. She blamed the melting snowflakes for the stickiness that coated her skin, fear sweat seeping from her pores. She blamed the pattering of her heart on her poor health coupled with the lengthy climb.

She felt the cold grip of terror wrap around her heart as she crested the mountain, and saw pawsteps leading downwards, interspersed with large, concave areas in the snow.

The Cleric smelled a familiar scent on the wind, the scent of a body shutting down, but she convinced herself it could never belong to the one she sought. She convinced herself it came from whatever prey he had caught, even though there wasn't a trace of any scent other than his own.

She didn't bother trying to reason with herself as to why she broke into a run as the scent grew nearer, closer, fresher.

She broke into a dead sprint as a telepathic cry rang out across the landscape, resounding through the aether like a death rattle.

She didn't think she'd ever moved so fast when she saw the limp form of the Dragon Emperor lying in the snow, a compacted trail behind him, as though he had been unable to do more than crawl. She didn't even speak as she pulled up to a stop next to him, her paws immediately flying to his body to part his fur, pressing against his flesh.

He was still breathing, she could see it misting in front of his nose.

But he was little more than a skeleton, his thick pelt having hid much of the damage.

She couldn't convince herself that the scent of a decaying body belonged to anything other than him, and she had to bite back a rattling gasp of a sob as she smoothed his fur back down, leaning down to run her tongue over his face, uncaring of propriety of closeness.

She hadn't been close enough to him to really notice before, too trapped in her own worries and thinking that surely, surely someone who had once been the Jade Dragon would know the true value of a full belly. Would know just how important it was to eat.

It seemed that he did, but had forgotten along the way that he did not hold the secret to immortality.

He was not a god, he was just a man, and he had been trying to act like one. To act as though he could carry on no matter what, and that he did not need to care for himself like he would care for any mortal.

She continued to run her tongue over his face, eyes, nose, lips, trying to warm him even if just a little and stimulate his body to keep breathing.

He may have failed himself in this act, but she had also failed him. She was supposed to look out for these things, and had been watching everyone so closely as of late. Making sure that everyone was eating and staying warm and not overexerting themselves.

She had been so careful.

But she had trusted him.

And because of that she'd failed him.

"You fucking idiot."

Her voice was choked as she reached around to grasp him by the scruff of his neck, even she, weak and hungry as she was too, managing to lift his emaciated form and haul him backwards, even if just a little. She had to get him out of the divot he had created before he froze to death. Back onto the snow he had already flattened so that way he wasn't so buried.

She felt her limbs trembling as she tried to pull him back the way she had came, her body telling her that she couldn't continue to haul him like this, she didn't have the strength. Not now.

She hadn't even made it a few steps.

She stepped back for a moment, tears dripping to the snow below, melting it where the halt, salted water hit. It created small pockets in the frozen land like bullet holes. She couldn't move him, couldn't get him back to warmth and safety. She was too weak herself. She couldn't save him.

Yes you can.

She would never know what said it. Whether it was her own mind, Asura, Isthanos, Alteil, an elemental, the aether itself, she would never know. But it was said, and she realized what it meant.

She didn't think she had ever called upon her powers faster, feeling her muscles ripple and stretch, heat and energy flowing through her body provided to her only by aether. If she didn't have the physical means to have the strength, then she'd have to lean on the aetheric. Her skeleton twisted, growing larger, more ferocious.

But she wasn't here to hunt. Wasn't here to fight. Wasn't here to kill.

Her spine changed the way it attached to her skull, and the woman's large forepaws, almost like monkey's paws now, pushed off from the ground, as she sat back on her back legs, stumbling a little as she found her balance. Her forelegs had swelled much more than her hind, and it made her very top heavy as she tried to stand on two limbs alone. Her voice was lost to little more than warg grumbles as she managed to right herself, bipedaly taking those few steps that separated her from the Dragon Emperor.

It shouldn't have been this easy to scoop him into her arms.

She towered at nearly twice his size like this, even more so with his miserable state.

That was very good, in a way. It meant that she could surround his frozen form in her own, warm him with her own body heat. It meant that she could try and keep him warm as she began running back up the mountain, racing as swiftly as possible towards her own den on two legs, the body of the Dragon Emperor pressed firmly against her breast by massive forelimbs, fueled by little more than a warg's anger. Anger at him for being such a selfless, selfless idiot.

Anger was just a way of showing love, sometimes, as hot tears flicked behind her as she ran, buffeted away by the wind. A shimmering trail that pockmarked the snow behind her.

If she could just get him to a place where he would be warm, she might buy enough time to save his life.


OOC: tl;dr: She goes Warg, gets swol, and is running back towards her den.

Haakan Low Control
— Portrayed by Tobii
Male Akdarr V Heterosexual

"It feels like I'm a lone survivor, forgotten in a dark and deadly world."
"And on my own I walk alone, to see the sun again; I'd give anything."
. . .Haa~kan~. . .

What was this feeling? His skin tingled with the sensation of basking in a warm, soothing light. His eyes weren't open, but the way the feeling engulfed every square inch of his hulking being and the intensity of radiance against sealed eyelids was enough to make him believe he was entirely surrounded by it. . . .Haakan. . .?

Who? Was that..him?

He couldn't remember. It felt as though he were drifting through space, free from the confines of gravity with no central compass to tell him if he was right-side up or upside down. Time didn't exist here. He wasn't even certain if he himself even existed here. If it weren't for the delicate and pristine vocals in the distance he was convinced he could disappear forever if he let himself sink into the light. It had a transcendental quality about it; it stripped him of all cares, worries, fears, and doubts. It filled him with ease and soothed his once aching bones. It called to him, and he found it irresistible.


The voice was but a whisper, yet it sounded as though someone were speaking directly into his ear; close enough that felt their breath brush across the hairs of his inner canal. His eyes snapped open. No, he wasn't where he thought he was at all, this was...

It's the birds, you know.

His head snapped to the left of him where he now laid on all fours. Had this male always been here? What had happened to the jungle around him when he first opened his eyes? Was this a cave..?


You shouldn't concern yourself with the opinions of sheep!

His head snapped over to the right. A goat?? He was beyond confused; confounded to say the least. That was when the corner of his eye caught onto a dark, ominous figure directly in front of him. He was almost too afraid to turn his head and view it as he wondered if this entity had also been there the entire time listening...watching.

You're a fucking idiot.

The hairs that ran along his rump to the nape of his neck stood on edge, his ears flattening back against his scalp as he peered into the darkness ahead that was no longer a figure, but just a pair of yellow eyes gleaming at him in the distance. He couldn't speak or move in the slightest. His eyes shot over to the left to see if the male from before was still there, but the darkness had devoured everything surrounding him, and by the time he'd managed to turn his gaze back to the front, the pair of yellow eyes was right in front of him. His heart jumped, skipping several beats.

You won't always have wings to guide you — at some point a butterfly will always join into the sea.

He nodded in agreement, completely unaware of any previous events that had transpired. This shaman was making perfect sense to him, and these snowy mountains felt like home. "I should have chosen wiser. Now I'll never join the sea." He released a long drawn sigh, but the female beside him simply smiled at him and lowered her head to catch his attention with her gaze once more.

A sleeping lion must wake twice before the caves appear. So too, shall you.

He could feel himself drifting between states of consciousness as he began to see the idiocrasy behind her speech. He felt as though he were moving, her face melting before his eyes as he finally returned back to the realm he'd left behind and gazed up at a lupine figure pressing him into it's breast. Who...?

He'd lost consciousness again before he could answer his own question.

I speakI think

Near death experience/dream state Haakan for most of the post, followed by a brief strain of consciousness :) ENJOY!


Haakan possesses Aura of Truth, and can tell when someone is lying.
Please mention lies in your post OOCly!
Saellyn Savage
— Portrayed by Lynx
Female Akdarr V Homosexual
She half thought she heard half-conscious murmuring of words, or perhaps that simply the result of hope and the wind in her ears. Either way, he was still breathing, that much she could tell, and that much she was desperate for it to continue.

Her paws pounded against the frozen snow, and she tensed lower to the ground as she approached the lip of a stone. There was a small fissure separating the direct path between here and her den, and while it was less than a minute to detour around it, every second wasted with slower routes was a second closer the Emperor was to death. She leapt, only the power of a warg giving her the strength to make such a jump on two legs, with another body in her arms no less.

She reached out for the ground with her paws, body bending down as she landed, taking the momentum and using it to hurl herself forwards, bent down over the prone form in her grasp. She lowered her head to try and shield him from the cold as she kept sprinting forwards, racing over the snow with everything she had.

Ruby eyes looked down in time to see the one good eye Haakan had blearily peering at her, fever and confusion written in its depths before it slid shut again, the man falling back into unconsciousness. She shifted her grip to try and pat at his face.

"No, come on Haakan, stay with me."

She had to look back up, not being to see where she was going as she tried to wake him. She shook him a little in her grasp, gritting her teeth as she had to slow down in order to safely traverse a patch of clear ice, knowing that running too fast would lead to her slipping and potentially crushing the man in her arms if her added bulk collapsed on top of his frail form.

It would likely kill him.

She couldn't afford to fall.

She picked up the pace the moment she was able to, and wanted to just about cry in relief as her den came into sight. She was given another burst of energy by the mere appearance of it on the horizon, and made it to the entrance in what felt like no time at all and far, far too long.

She didn't have any additional bedding made up, the ranks too thin for her to have made another nest for patients. So she simply tucked him into hers as swiftly as she was able, using the benefit of her warg's opposable thumbs to pull the pelts further in around him, trying to keep him as warm as possible.

"We've lost too many for you to fucking die on me now."

Her voice was a deep rumble in this form, hardly indistinguishable from a man's. But it was still her.

She had to drop back to all fours in order to be able to move around, moving as quickly as she could to the pack to haphazardly dig through her meager herb supplies. Containers rattled to the floor in loud crashes as she pushed them aside, searching for the actual plants that she had within. No, actually...

She fumbled about for a few more moments, before finding what it was she needed.

"Siem! Take this and fill it with snow. Put it on the warm spot."

She thrust a curved rock out, capable of holding some amounts of water. It was a natural formation in the rock, and she had deepened it by spending evenings scratching at it with her claws, allowing it to hold more. The little squirrel took it from her grasp, just barely managing to drag the rock over to the 'warm spot', a small place in the back of the den that seemed to be more naturally heated than the rest of it, made for a good place to melt snow into water.

After leaving the rock there, he began making trips of running outside and carrying snow back in in his arms, dumping the frozen material into the rock before repeating the process.

Saellyn, meanwhile was just about ready to sob in relief as she found a small handful of old, shriveled up fruits of the Spiny Devil, old things she had collected ages ago by the lake. They would work.

Siem wasn't done bringing snow into the rock, but she made her way over there anyway, setting about grinding the dried fruits to as close to a powder as she could between her large forepaws. She plucked the more stubborn ones to shreds with her claws, putting the crushed up fruits into the melting snow, which was already half water by this point. She'd be able to get Haakan to swallow it this way.

She went back to her supplies, and felt that it was little more than divine intervention that allowed her to find some relatively fresh Orangewort. Asura must really be looking out for them both today. She'd make sure to give thanks once Haakan was taken care of.

The petals were swiftly ripped to shreds as she came back to the rock, an exhausted Siem sprawled next to it and panting from exertion. She added them to the mixture, beginning to puff on it to speed up the melting of the last few bits of snow within. It'd be cold as shit, but he'd just about frozen to death, the fact that it was above freezing made it warmer than where he had been.

When the mixture was ready, the Cleric was very careful to cradle it between her forepaws, shuffling over to Haakan on her back legs and taking care not to spill a drop. Shifting her grip to one hand only, she reached forwards, propping his head up onto her thigh and prying his jaws open. She lightly poured some of the mixture onto his tongue, closing his jaws and setting about to rubbing his throat, forcing his swallow reflex to trigger.

She repeated the process, trying to get the sugars of the Spiny Devil fruit and the warming properties of the Orangewort petals into him, anything to give him even the smallest bit more of energy and perk him up enough to stay awake so he could eat. Her voice was a quiet murmur as she treated him.

"You are going to drink all of this so that way you can stay awake long enough for me to go out there, hunt you something, and then I am not going to leave you alone again until you've eaten it for me, do you understand?"


OOC: Doctor Saellyn is in the house

Haakan Low Control
— Portrayed by Tobii
Male Akdarr V Heterosexual

"It feels like I'm a lone survivor, forgotten in a dark and deadly world."
"And on my own I walk alone, to see the sun again; I'd give anything."

The Emperor awoke in a sharp state of panic, his eyes wide as he choked on the last bit of medicine being coaxed down his throat. He'd accidentally inhaled some of it in the process of swallowing, sending him straight into a coughing fit followed by a rather stout burp. His eyes darted across the room as his chest began to heave inward and out at an abnormally rapid pace, clearly panicked. ...where...wh—? he thought to himself before he took notice of Saellyn in her warg state.

The adrenaline coursing through his veins made it impossible for him to understand what she was saying, aside from something about food.

The sight of her sent his head smashing into the ceiling with a loud hollow thud as he jolted away from her. His eyes clenched shut as he ground his teeth together and quickly clamped his ears down against his skull. Ouch. The sharp spikes of his horns chipped away at the soil, causing a few tendrils of plant root to droop down and dirt to slowly leak through. "What's going on!?" he asked, his nose twitching to rid himself of the falling dirt.

His rapid breathing was leaking into his speech. It was to the point it was clearly noticeable every time he stopped to swallow, even when not talking. His heart felt as though it were about to leap out from his throat at any moment now, and it wasn't until he took a larger, shaky breath that he began to calm himself. Saellyn; he could smell her now. "You..startled me..." he chuckled nervously, letting himself sink back into the bedding. A loud, audible groan reverberated from his stomach as he winced.

"What..? ..I.." he was so confused. He didn't know what to say or where to begin. He couldn't remember anything, and he didn't understand why he was here with Saellyn of all wolves. His heart jumped at a thought, his ears flattening back down against his scalp as he looked up at her with desperate, worried eyes. "Has something happened..? Is everyone okay...?" They were all he could think about. Had something happened to his pack?

I speakI think


Haakan possesses Aura of Truth, and can tell when someone is lying.
Please mention lies in your post OOCly!
Saellyn Savage
— Portrayed by Lynx
Female Akdarr V Homosexual
The suddenness of his wake up plus how concentrated she was in getting the medicine down his throat resulted in Saellyn being quite shocked when Haakan roused himself from his self-induced coma. Saellyn fumbled with the curved stone in her hands, Haakan's head smashing into her forepaws and nearly knocking it from her grasp, to say nothing of the sharp sting of one of his horns scraping her pads from where she had been holding him. It didn't bleed, but it still stung and left a white streak from where the skin was torn at.

She had thought the choking and burp was simply his body doing its thing while he was asleep, and hadn't noticed the panic rousing in his eyes until he surged upwards, and it was only then that she even noticed that they were open. She winced, both for the man and for the loud sound of his head impacting with the roof of her den. She warily watched the dirt that fell down to see if any further structural damage had been caused. Seeing nothing of much concern, she looked back at her now woken patient, who seemed to be on the verge of hyperventilating as he stared at her in alarm.

"What's going on!?"

She set the curved stone down, the warg woman making slow 'down' motions with her forepaws, trying to get him to calm down so that he didn't pass back out from shock.

"Haakan. Breathe."

Simple words for a clearly addled mind, and it seemed to work, as he slowly managed to heave air into lungs, the terror in his eyes making way for recognition as he looked at her fully for the first time.

"You... startled me..."

Yes, she had rather gathered that from the way he seemed to be trying to give himself a concussion, attempting to damage the one part of his body that seemed to be mostly alright currently. His stomach made a keening noise as it set about trying to digest what little she'd gotten into him, and she was quite painfully reminded of exactly why she had had to haul ass to get him back here before he withered away to nothingness on the mountains.

He'd made a damn good head start on doing so, too.

He was slowly moving through a plethora of emotions, terror having given way to recognition, which was now giving way to confusion as he looked around. To be fair, they had known of each other and known one another for most of their lives, such is what happened when you both lived in the same pack for two years, and both came from rather well known families, but they weren't exactly what one would consider close friends, their lives leading them in very different paths with little else other than their loyalty to Zaktan'en to tie them together.

"What...? I..."

He was looking around, confused. She let him get his thoughts in order. Except, he didn't seem to be putting together the thoughts she was hoping for. She was hoping for a thank you, or an explanation as to why he was being so stupid. Or even an apology for having been so idiotic and caused so much fear to his packmates by nearly dying when there were so few left as it was.

Instead, she got exactly what she should have expected, if the state she found him in was any indication.

"Has something happened...? Is everyone okay...?"

Hearing those words, hearing how selflessly concerned he was for everyone else and for everyone else alone... really pissed her off right now.

He just didn't get it, did he?

At first, it only came through in calm, collected words.

"Yes, Haakan, something has happened. In fact, a member of the pack is in very real danger and that's why I had to shift to my warg state in an attempt to save them."

She didn't let him speak as her eyes narrowed, shifting forwards to stand on all fours, her body, swollen with aether, shifting slightly as her claws flexed in agitation.

"In fact, I'm looking right at him."

She stomped one of her feet forwards, taking a single step and making no effort to hide her very real frustration and anger at his actions.

"And he has to be one of the stupidest and most selfish wolves I've ever met, right now."

She closed what little space was between them, leaving only enough room for her to feasibly talk as her voice increased just the tiniest bit in pitch.

"I went out this morning to go talk to you, to ask you a question. I just wanted to know if it was alright if I took a few of the wolves remaining and went out on an herb gathering trip, since we don't currently have any Botanists to do it for us. I went out to go speak to my leader, who I placed my faith in to be strong and to know what was best for the pack, and what did I find? I found that very leader who I had trusted to be doing the right thing sprawled out in the snow, inches away from death, because he had somehow got it into his head that the best choice for the pack was to let himself starve to death and give the food to everyone else. Because I damn well saw him hunting and making successful catches, and the man that I found did not have the body of a man who had eaten even a one of those catches."

Her eyes were alight with fury, only fueled to even greater heights by the warg state she was currently in.

"Oh I get exactly where you're coming from, you want to do what's best for the pack. You want to be the best leader you can be and provide for your people."

Her voice mounted to a very real roar as fury got the better of her. She had never been so pissed off. If it had been any other wolf, fine. People made stupid mistakes all the time. But she had trusted him to know how to handle the responsibilities he was faced with, and to understand that he was just as important as anyone else, if not more so. And that trust had been broken.


She wasn't roaring in his face any more, but she was still certainly speaking far louder than she normally would in any other circumstance. Some part of her mind knew that she really shouldn't be yelling at a patient, but she was angry. And she was hurt. Because she'd trusted him, and she'd been failed.

"You seem to act like it doesn't matter if you die, so long as the rest of the pack lives on. But tell me, honestly, what do you think would happen to the rest of the pack if you died? Do you really think that they would be able to recover from your death? Do you really not understand how much you mean to them? No, don't answer that, I'll do it for you. You are our leader. And right now, there's barely any of us left. You have been one of the few scraps of hope that this pack can cling to in this dark time, one of the few lights left in the eyes of this pack.

I don't think you understand how badly it would hurt everyone if you died. I don't think you really realize just how likely it would be that this pack would completely disintegrate if you died, because you are practically all that we have left. We're lost, and we looked for a leader to guide us out of the dark, and what we got was some stupid idiot who thought that no one would care if he died. Well, news flash, if I hadn't found you in time to save you from your own selfish and idiotic actions, this pack would probably have broken apart. I'd probably have stuck with Aziza because we're family, but that's probably all either of us would have had anymore. We'd have fallen apart."

She heaved in a gulp of air, still glaring at him as if she dared him to speak while she tried to find it within her to continue. Her voice was quieter, speaking so loudly and so much taking it's toll on a woman not used to speaking for so long, but she was nowhere fucking near done.

"Let me put it another way, make it easier to understand by separating you from the situation and telling you to look at it from a different perspective. Let's say you were a healer, just like me. Two wolves are brought in, both with horrible injuries after a hunt gone wrong. To make it even worse, they're mates, and they're so close that they can't live without each other, it would break their hearts and souls if the other died. If you ignore both of them, they're both going to die.

Now, neither you nor I would ever do such a thing, but just know that if they're ignored, they're going to die. Think about what you would do, and I'll tell you what I think you would do, and then I'll tell you what I would do. Now, I think, that you would start pouring everything you knew into taking care of one of the wolves, trying your best to save them, and you'd likely succeed. In this scenario, you're a good healer, and if you pour everything you have into one wolf, you can definitely save them, but the other one wound up dying because you were so busy making 100% sure that you saved one that you didn't treat the other at all, and left them to die.

Now, before you say, 'but I'd treat both of them, give them both as much of a fighting chance as I could because even if one of them died you said the other would die anyways of heartbreak because the other was gone'. You're right, I did say that, you want to know why I think you would pour everything into one wolf?"

She raised a paw, poking him harshly in the chest, not caring for a moment that he was already weak as it was. He deserved it.

"Because that's exactly what you just fucking did, Haakan. You poured so much of yourself into saving the pack, that you forgot that the pack would wither away without you. You poured so much into saving one wolf, that yes, you saved them, but you forgot that without saving the other wolf, without saving yourself, the one that you did save wouldn't be able to make it anyways. For whatever reason, in your mind, that was the only option you had. But let me tell you, I'm a healer, and I know from my own experience that that other option was still there. You could have put effort into saving both of them. There's no guarantee that either of them would have made it, but you would have given them both a fighting chance if nothing else, and as long as they were together, there was a chance that they could have both pulled through. You had two choices, save one and leave the other to die, or try to give both of them as much a chance as possible, and you made the wrong fucking choice.

Now do you understand why I'm angry with you? I trusted you to know what was the right thing to do, I put faith in you as a leader, I trusted you to be a good healer and to save both wolves, to give them both a fighting chance because if you only saved one the other would die anyway. But you acted selfishly, you wanted so badly to save one of them and make sure that they lived that you forgot what was the best choice for them. Being a healer means looking at the whole picture, and not doing what you want to do, not doing what makes you feel like you're being as good a healer as possible by saving a life, but by doing what is best for your patients. Because what good is one without the other?

What good is a pack without their leader? I'm not saying you were wrong to share your kills, because hell, what good is a leader without a pack? But how would you expect me to be able to treat people and save lives if I didn't care for myself? That's right, I wouldn't be able to, so how the fuck did you think you could be a good leader if you didn't take care of yourself and make sure that you were capable of leading to begin with."

She heaved for breath, her words having died to a low growl of anger near the end. She stared at him, before taking a deep breath and stepping back, making to move towards the entrance of the den.

"Now then, I want you to take the pelts in my nest, and move them over to the corner where it's warmer. I don't know why, but it's warmer over there, and you are nothing but skin and bones and practically froze to death already, I won't have you doing it again. I want you to go lay down over there and don't do anything, don't move around too much and don't stress yourself out. All you're running on right now is what little sugar was in those old fruits I managed to get you to swallow with the medicine, and that won't last for very long. You don't have much energy, and you can't waste it, but make sure not to fall asleep either. I didn't know if you'd be able to wake up the first time, and with how much energy you wasted by being scared and flailing about, I don't know if you'll have the energy to wake up a second time to eat."

She fully stepped into the entrance, sticking her head out for a moment before looking back at him over her shoulder.

"I am going to go out and hunt you something to eat, and I'm not going to leave you alone until you've eaten as much as your stomach can handle. Unlike you, I've eaten recently, so I am actually healthy enough to be able to do this. Stay here, stay warm, and don't go to sleep until you've eaten. Think about what I've said while I'm gone, we can talk more after you've eaten and rested."

She paused for a moment, almost ready to leave, before she caught herself and added one more thing.

"Just don't die on me. You already broke my trust once, don't break it again."

And she headed out into the cold without another word.


OOC: She mad

Haakan Low Control
— Portrayed by Tobii
Male Akdarr V Heterosexual

"It feels like I'm a lone survivor, forgotten in a dark and deadly world."
"And on my own I walk alone, to see the sun again; I'd give anything."
Nothing could have prepared him for the hell about to be unleashed.

He'd confused the look in her eyes just before she spoke for contention. He narrowed his brows and pressed his lips together tightly, steeling himself for whatever news she harbored. His ears folded down against his scalp, a visible lump rolling downward in his esophagus accompanied by the subtle nod of his head to signal he was ready for whatever she had to say.

"Yes, Haakan, something has happened. In fact, a member of the pack is in very real danger and that's why I had to shift to my warg state in an attempt to save them."

Fuck. How had he missed someone? He'd been so careful to make sure he checked on everyone throug— The look in her eyes and the change in stance caught him off guard. It nearly sent a chill up his spine as his only good eye scanned over every inch of her face in a study of her expression. It was almost as if she was mad at... him? He truly was not ready for this; not in the slightest.

"In fact, I'm looking right at him."

Wha—, he barely managed to slip a single word out before she stomped a foot towards him and glared at him with the intensity of a thousand suns. He wasn't used to being reprimanded by anyone, let alone a woman. He'd been raised by males his entire life, and had always been led to believe it was his responsibility to ensure the females were kept happy and well provided for. He blinked a few times, gulping down a strand of saliva as he continued to search her expression. She was serious. There was no charming his way out of this one, and he wasn't sure what to do aside from letting her say her piece.

"And he has to be one of the stupidest and most selfish wolves I've ever met, right now."

The words caused the corners of his lips to quiver and sag as he did his best to keep them perched together in a straight line. His ears flattened completely along the base of his skull, and his brows softened, eyes glazing with liquid in the faintest amount. Stupid...? Selfish...? The only time he'd ever heard those words before was when he'd protested leaving his birth lands as his father insisted on trading him off to Zaktan'en's ranks in return for protection. He'd been worried about his mother's health, and didn't want to leave her, but his sire insisted it was the best thing he could possibly do for both his mother and his family. The thought was painful to recall, and to hear Saellyn say it felt like aetheric daggers were being driven into his chest. She was so close to him that it was growing uncomfortable.

"I went out this morning to go talk to you, to ask you a question..."

He wasn't emotionally in the state to handle such a scolding. His face twisted and contorted into a number of expressions: mostly sadness, but some anger and sternness mixed in. She had no idea what he'd dealt with. In the past weeks he'd worked himself to the bone to fill every role the pack was missing, including his alpha duties. He'd seen wolves go into seizing fits and develop severe cases of frostbite, losing limbs. Any sane wolf would have packed up the entire group and left the mountains, but Haakan was honor bound to fulfill the promise he'd made to the late Emperor Tybalt. That didn't stop his heart from bleeding for them, the wolves who had placed their faith and futures with him. A wolf was nothing without the pack, and an alpha could easily be replaced when necessary such as Tybalt had been.

His eyes had left hers periodically to concentrate on the speech, but once he returned to meet them again he could see the fire burning behind them and it caused him to twist his lips sideways and furrow his brows. She continued to speak about understanding him, but he didn't appreciate the mocking contempt hidden beneath the words when she raised her voice. No, he didn't think she understood his point of view at all. How could she? She hadn't been raised by two alpha males that instilled certain values and ethics into her.

He flinched when she asked him what good a dead leader was, keeping his eyes closed as his head slowly turned outward to the side. His brows remained furrowed, but his lips were pressed flat, his cheeks caving inward very slightly as though he were holding his tongue to bide her fury. His stomach gurgled loudly between her words, not fully accepting the tonic she'd forced down into him after being empty for such a prolonged period of time. Please don't be sick....please don't be sick...not right now... he prayed to himself silently.

She continued on as he grew nauseous. His head slightly spinning, and was starting to throb a bit in the location he'd bumped up against the ceiling. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep himself sitting upright like this, but he'd try to make her feel better. He understood she had discrepancies, but now really wasn't the time to chew him out. Besides, this wasn't about him as far as he was concerned now. She was stretching it on for far too long. This was about her, and some value she had instilled inside of her core that he'd touched a nerve on. He was adamant about getting to the bottom of it as soon as he was able to, but right now he just simply didn't possess the strength. It hurt him to know this troubled her so much...that she'd lost her faith in him entirely because of a sacrifice he tried to make in a dire situation. Opinions were like assholes though, as Tybalt would say; everyone had one...or maybe that was someone else.

He turned back to look at her once she'd stopped to catch her breath, mentioning she'd probably only stay with Aziza if the pack broke up and once again he was met with a look of pure disgust. He inhaled a deep breath, attempting to calm himself and hopefully distill the situation if he showed no aggression back. It seemed to be working as her voice got quieter, but it could have also been purely from the rate at which she was talking since she did have a raspy quality attached to her words now.

He wished he had more energy to listen more to what she had to say, but he really didn't. The best he could do after that point was just nod and hang his head. He was so tired, and his bones ached. Bearish forelimbs wobbled uncontrollably in short bursts as he struggled to keep himself sitting upright. It was like being a child again, forced to train until he couldn't feel his feet anymore and then listen to his father go on about honor and privilege afterwards. He only looked back up at her when she pawed him in the chest and sent him jerking back, nearly losing his balance as he staggered forward with an "umph".

He was barely sitting up at this point now, his shoulders quivering as his weight dispersed from his forelimbs to his deltoids. Sae—Saellyn.. he murmured under his breath, but she didn't seem to hear him. He felt so unwell. All he could do was open his maw and let himself pant a bit. Eventually it reached the point where his muscles just no longer could function properly, and he slipped down to the floor with a cheek brushing across the length of her forearm as he fell into her, still panting. His eyes fluttered as he fought to stay conscious, chest heaving with every breath he drew. Oh gods, Saellyn please... he thought to himself. Had she saved him just to have a last word before he died? This all seemed rather pointless given the state of things, but she clearly wasn't finished.

Finally, either she was starting to catch on or she had finished speaking her piece. She stepped back to give him the space he needed to lay his head down on the floor. He heard the first few sentences that followed, but the rest was starting to blur together. "Saellyn...I—
I don't know..if I can..."
he rasped, trying to keep breathing as best he could. "Listen...I— my body won't let me." It was painful to admit, and he hated admitting how weak he was right now...but it was a reality he needed to face.

I speakI think


Haakan possesses Aura of Truth, and can tell when someone is lying.
Please mention lies in your post OOCly!
Saellyn Savage
— Portrayed by Lynx
Female Akdarr V Homosexual
Her body had moved instinctually to brace his when he stumbled, even as her mind was solely occupied by the feeling of betrayal and anger that consumed her. No, it wasn't quite rage, that was rather a different emotion, one that would imply a want to hurt them who she was enraged with. No, she wasn't quite enraged.

But angry? Oh yes.

It was as she made to move to the entrance, and found herself having to support the Emperor's entire meager weight as he panted uselessly at her that she figured perhaps she had gone a tad bit overboard. She reached up to wrap a burly and somewhat sapien forelimb about his trembling form, securing him between her shoulder and the arm attached to it as she kept him from falling over. Ah... perhaps he was not in the best of shape for a lecture, she had no regrets over the words she had to say, and would most assuredly say them again when he was in a better state to listen, but by his pained tone and panted words... perhaps he had barely heard anything that she had to say in the first place.

She closed her eyes as he trembled against her, taking one slow, deep breath through her nose.

She had to be professional about this.

She didn't say a thing as she opened her eyes once more, slowly shifting him in her warg grasp until his meager, emaciated form was supported beneath her large arm, cradled against her chest and with his feet lifted off the ground, on his back in her grasp like a mewling pup. She was as gentle as she could be so as not to startle his stomach, he needed to keep the tonic down, it was the only thing that could give him strength for right now.

With him supported, she ignored the slight tremble that overtook her own limbs as a dull throb of pain began to make itself known in the back of her skull. She was not accustomed to such heavy magic usage as of late, and while she had chosen this form for the very fact that it was useful in situations like these, it had been far too long since she last used it extensively, and weariness of her own had begun to set in.

But she had the strength to support him until she could get him situated.

It was awkward, shifting her hind legs far enough forward until she was squatting with all of her weight shifted onto them, using her free forelimb to shuffle the bedding about until she could move it over to the warm spot, but she managed. She shuffled the pelts and foliage around as much as she could to give as much cushioning as was possible, anything to help take the pain off of his bony frame. Once she had gotten everything moved, she shuffled forward on three limbs, gently depositing him in the haphazard nest and beginning to tuck the softest of the materials closer around him and on top of him, bundling him in as best she could to keep as much warmth in his form as possible.

After a moment's deliberation, she turned and scooped up the curved stone that the tonic had been in, shuffling outside with still not a word more spoken and washing it with some of the snow that lay about the area, before packing it full of more of the frozen substance. She shuffled back in and set it down near Haakan, making sure that it was on the warm spot to melt but placing some of the bedding as a barrier between him and it, to help keep its cold away from him while he warmed up.

Saellyn's head was beginning to pound with the exertion of maintaining the form for so long, and she began to make her way back to the entrance. She didn't let the warg state drop though, not quite yet, using the way it deepened her voice to that of a man's and the sheer hulking build it gave her to add more authority to her words as she turned to the trembling man behind her.

"I'm going hunting, stay there and don't fall asleep, no matter how tired you feel. You may not ever wake back up if you do."

And with that, she turned and left, twin tails trailing behind her as she exited the den, finally allowing the warg state to drop as she cleared from his line of sight, pausing for a moment to raise her paw to her head now that she was in the open expanse of day, a dribble of blood dripping from her nose to stain the snow with crimson as she winced at the throbbing pain.

But she had more important things to do, and she forced herself to set the paw back down, the blood staining her nose beginning to dry in the cold air as her tongue swiped at it to clean it up, the heavyset woman setting off in search of something with more meat on its bones than Haakan.


Haakan Low Control
— Portrayed by Tobii
Male Akdarr V Heterosexual
The effort it took to keep himself concious was astonishing. With each inhale he reminded himself to force weary eyes open. He clung to this life by a strand, gripping the string with all his might to prevent the gods themselves from severing the tie. Her words resounded within the mind, reminding him that such a simple act as closing his eyes might have very well robbed him of life; somethng he would very much prefer to avoid at all costs.

He kept his mind occupied, turning towards the packed bowl Saellyn left to lap hungerly at the frozen substance and remain hydrated. With one more inhale his head swirled, a numbness washing over him akin to one formed from too much drink when partaking in merriment. Stay awake until she returns... he told himself, though it was easier said than done. There was little within the cave to occupy the mind, leaving the overpowering instinct to drift towards slumber the more appealing option.

Seconds seemed like minutes, and minutes and seemed like hours. He prayed to the gods or whoever else would listen to return the healer to the den as quickly as possible. The only thing he could think of was Noelle..the woman he'd once loved with all his heart who held the title of Azure Dragon like the wife of late Emperor Tybalt before him. Where was she now? Did she yet draw breath in this life?

"Noelle..." masculine vocals just barely spoke out. He would trade anything to feel her embrace once more...


Haakan possesses Aura of Truth, and can tell when someone is lying.
Please mention lies in your post OOCly!

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